Crystal Jordan :: Blog

As usual on a Wednesday, I blogged over at Shadows of Passion. This time I talked about writing without focus or even a general clue. Lots of fun for the whole family.

Now for Hump Day Hotties.

I’m not doing the usual entry this week. Instead I’m doing an homage to weird spoof movie posters. Some even have hotties on them.

Finding Nemo becomes horror–cartoon style. Cue JAWS theme music.

Silence of the Lambs as a romantic comedy. Anthony Hopkins is the Centrum Silver answer to hotty.

Tom Hanks as stalker. Has he ever played a villain? Like real, true honest to goodness villain? I don’t think so. Well, here he is folks! Cutey Tom (over forty crowd favorite–except George. And maybe Viggo.) makes the Hump Day Hotty list for like, the only time, ever.

Poltergeist meet romantic drama/comedy/sorta-kinda-thingie. Orlando is hawt. So, this my bonafide hotty poster. Too bad he’s starting to crack under th pressure.

This is why Jim Carrey should never do drama. It just ain’t his thang. Though, he’s kinda cute/hotty if you tilt your head sideways and squint. This picture just caught him at a bad angle…yeah, that ’s. Bad angle.

Okay, I promised Ms. Eden I’d do this bad boy for her after she tagged me. So here’s four things you may or may not know about me (or even want to know about me).

Four Jobs I’ve Had:
1. Community Service Events Coordinator
2. Administrative Assistant
3. Museum
4. Librarian

Four Places I’ve Lived:
1. California Bay Area
2. Sacramento, California
3. Indiana
4. Appalachian Mountains in Tennessee/Kentucky

Four Favorite Foods:
1. Is it edible? That’s the one! (I didn’t get these hips by accident, you know!)
2. Chinese food (Eat it and you’re ready for more 30 minutes later. see abouve statement)
3. Chocolate (It has it’s own food group)
4. Chai Tea (cold or hot, I’m not picky–as per food choice #1)

Movies I Could Watch Over and Over
1. Practical Magic
2. Lord of the Rings Trilogy (extended edition, naturally)
3. Pride & Prejudice
4. Underworld (hot vampire on werewolf action–woot!)

Four TV Shows I Watch:
1. The OC (Mad Madam M makes me!)
2. Gilmore Girls (even erotic romance writers need wholesome family fun)
3. Heroes (cute boys, superpowers, what more could a girl ask for?)
4. America’s Next Top Model (a guilty pleasure I’ve had since their first season)

Four Places I’ve Visited:
1. Canada (border hopped for lunch once with Mad Madam M)
2. Yellowstone National Park (Old Faithful is really not that cool when you’re a teen. And word to the wise–buffalos in the wild smell like death)
3. Puerto Vallarta
4. Atlanta (okay, it’s not that cool, but I met all my friends at RWA last year! See you in Dallas, ladies!)

Four Places I’d Like To Visit:
1. The Cannes Film Festival (with M, of course)
2. London
3. Australia/ New Zealand (why not make it a 2-for-1 trip? They’re neighbors!)
4. Tahiti

Four Websites I Go To (almost) Daily:
1. Romance Divas
2. Passionate Ink Forum
3. Gena Showalter and Jill Monroe’s blog (ditto on the 2-for-1 neighbor thingie)
4. Google (I’m always having to search for stuff, so I might as well be honest –Librarians use Goggle too!)

Four People I’m Tagging To Do This:
1. Jen McKenzie
2. Shelli Stevens
3. Dayna Hart
4. Jill Monroe

I finished the first phase of the Every Witch Way overhaul project. I’ll be blogging about it later today over at The Novelty Girls.

So now my formerly-chick-lit book is a third person, possibly emotional urban fantasy romance with some action adventure/suspense to it. We’ll see.

More fun news, when I was at RWA Nationals in July I went to a book giveaway promo thing for the Silhouette Nocturne line and they didn’t have any books. I don’t know if they ran out super quick, but I THINK what happened is their books got lost in the mail and didn’t show up. That happened to a few very unfortunate authors at the literacy signing, and I felt really bad for them. Some even cried. It was sad.

Anyway, the point of this is I was told to sign a sheet and they’d send me free Nocturnes just for coming. I though, “Yeah, right.” but hey, it couldn’t hurt to try. The other day I got to thinking about that because I still hadn’t received my books and I’ve moved cross-country. My thought is even IF they did send them, and I had my doubts they’d remember to, the books would never reach me here in Salt Lake City.

Imagine my surprise when that same evening (crazily enough) I came home to find three Nocturnes on my porch, forwarded from the wilds of Appalachia. I was stoked. I’m going to read through them and see if one the ideas percolating on the backburner would work for the line.

Wish me luck!

So, the winner of my two contests yesterday are amywoods33 for any book on my backlist, and Liadan for a pdf of All She Wants for Christmas.

As a bonus, one of the other members of my group also got a copy of any book they wanted whaever2000.

Congrats ladies!

Today’s quiz is about your elf name. I’m appalled by mine. A.Pall.Ed. Happy McMini? Oh my Jesus.

Your Elf Name Is…

Happy Mc Mini

So, it’s become a bit of a habit to chat on Saturdays. I’m over at Joyfully Reviewed today.

URL: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Chatting_with_Joyfully_Reviewed/

I’m running two contests today and you’re welcome to join in.

1: Join my Yahoo group and you’ll have a chance to win any book off my backlist. (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/crystal-jordan/)

2: Email me to have a chance to win a pdf copy of All She Wants for Christmas. Just say you want a pdf copy, and you’re entered. Easy stuff. My email: crystal @ crystaljordan.com (no spaces)

I give you four reasons to love the holidays (and an escape from the insanity of malls, family, and eating until you die from it). I critiqued the books by my girls Emma, Jen, and Eden, so when I tell you they rocked me like a hurricane, I’m not talking out my buttocks. I really mean they were awesome possum. Then there’s Karen’s loverly book. I haven’t read it yet, but I was talking to Deanna over at Cobblestone Press and she teased me mercilessly with details and I want to read it really, really bad. So, I’m recommending it to you because, well, you should all want to read what I want to read. Duh.

The Taste of Christmas by Jennifer McKenzie

The holidays are difficult when you have a crazy family. Tabitha Durst would agree with that sentiment whole-heartedly. What do you do when a gorgeous guy witnesses just how crazy they are?

Go buy a present for yourself. You totally deserve it. Buy, buy, buy!

Fairies and Wishes by Karen Erickson

Lily the Christmas fairy must teach a lonely doctor how to love again, so she makes him fall in love with her. Big mistake since she always leaves earth the day after Christmas. But how can she leave the sweet, sexy doctor when she’s fallen in love with him, too?

You know you want some. Go buy!

Seducing St. Nic by Emma Petersen

Christmas is Barbara Jean Ruiz’s favorite time of year and she’s not going to let anyone ruin it for her. Not even her evil undead, but still super sexy, employer Cypriano San Nicolo. Can she show St. Nic how wondrous the holidays can be and just maybe something a little more?

Get your Christmas cheer on. Buy it!

A chance storm on December 21st, the Winter Solstice, drives psychologist Destiny Walker to a spontaneous consultation with a fortune-teller. When the psychic tells her she’s about to meet her soul mate, Destiny is dubious.

But when she runs into Superman look-alike Reece Kellan–literally–her rational world is turned upside down. Reece is funny, kind, and the sexiest man she’s ever seen. And when their bodies meet, the electricity they create could rival the storm raging outside. But there’s something more there, something mysterious, alluring and a little frightening. Is it possible the psychic was right, after all?

Buy here!

I found out that I sold my Valentine’s Day story Big Girls Don’t Die to Cobblestone Press.

Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaah, baby!

I’ve also been invited by my girl Dayna Hart to do another Valentine’s Day story for Forbidden Publications. This one will take place in the same club featured in Big Girls Don’t Die, so you can revisit the world if you like (and you should like because it’s a fun world). This one is called Twice in a Blue Moon.

I blogged over at Shadows of Passion about the pressures of writing a series and the scary-ass expectations that come along with it. Click here to read.

As promised, we have the Dumb But Pretty (TM)edition of Hump Day Hotties. This is a short list of what actually makes up a long line of actors who reeeeeeeeally qualify.

First, we have my beloved Vin Diesel. He’s hawt, I adore him. I watch his movies, no matter how bad. But they really are all bad. Because my boy here can’t act for crap. He’s just really pretty and very good at action movie mayhem.

Ben Affleck. Bennifer. Bennifer Take Two. Oh, Benny Benny Benny. Another very pretty boy, but thank God Matt Damon took the lead in Good Will Hunting or I’m thinking the movie that launched those two would have fallen flatter than a pancake.

Another guy I really adore. I love watching his films, but they usually stink. A good example: Sahara. Wow, did that movie suck. But I loved it and I own it. Why? Because it was fun, I know it sucked, but I’m fickle that way. Keep up the bad work, Matty. I’ll watch.

Chad Michael Murray. Gave up a spot on The OC to do the WB (now CW) show One Tree Hill. All I can say is Thank God. When The OC rocks, it rocks. And it never would have rocked with this Dumb But Pretty boy in the lead. So, from all of us out here a viewer land: Thank YOU, Chad Michael Murray!

Another WB/CW boy who went from Gilmore Girls fame to Supernatural. He’s cute, he looks good when silent and brooding. He looks like a dumbass fruitcake when he tries to act. Especially when he tries to CRY while acting. It just makes you want to pat his head and tell him it’ll be okay. Not because you believe the crying, but because you want to stop the madness of him trying to act.

So, that’s all folks. The Dumb But Pretty line-up of love. Tune in next week for the next installment of Hump Day Hotties.

That’s my motto for the day: whatever. I’m going to the office Christmas party and some presentations so I will get exactly no work done today. This would be good if i weren’t woefully behind right now. Okay, not behind behind, but not sprinting ahead like I like to.

Anyway, the Mad Madam M posted her favorite Christmas movies yesterday, so today I shall post my favorite Un-Christmas movies complete with posters.

Enjoy!

I blogged over at The Novelty Girls today about the continuing progress on changing Every Witch Way from first person point of view to third person point of view. As it stands, I have 242 pages and I spent the weekend converting and re-writing (a bit). I’m on page 100 right now. This is taking a whole lot longer than I anticipated, but we’ll see how it goes.

Emma Petersen, my critique partner in crime, blogged at The Novelty Girls yesterday about the soundtracks we put together for different works in progress.

I decided to take it a bit further (because I can). I don;t really have a soundtrack for my books so much as movies i like to play in the background while I’m writing. I find myself singing along if I have music on, and sometimes I don’t like that. I’m a fickle writer, deal with it.

Last night while I was re-writing Every Witch Way (which is, wait for it…urban fantasy/suspense/romantic comedy) I watched Season 2 of Veronica Mars (mystery/suspense), The Scorpion King (campy fantasy), and Underworld (who cares, the guy is hawt and has fangs!).